If tomorrow never comes
by Trix a.k.a F5C
Summary: MiyaAya ficcy... miyagi watches ayako in her sleep and his thoughts drift to their relationship


Title: If tomorrow never comes 1/1  
Author: Trix aka F5C  
Genre: Non- yaoi  
Pairing: MiyaAya  
Archive: FF.net I guess  
E-mail: chatterbox_shil@yahoo.com.

Artist: Ronan Keating  
Album: Destination  
Song: If Tomorrow Never Comes  
Disclaimer: Standard

Dedication: To TR… ya asked and I deliver… nyahahaha. Hopefully ya likey it… and dun worry me going to try to finish Fallen a.s.a.p.

^^

~starts typing~

_Sometimes late at night  
  
_

Miyagi walks back into the room, the plush carpet padding his footsteps as he slowly heads for her bed.

_I lie awake and watch her sleeping  
She's lost in peaceful dreams  
  
_

Her thick curly black tresses fall over her face, a face that now resembles one of an angel with that innocent look she has on. 

This is how she always is when asleep, beautiful, innocent… his lil' angel… his one and only angel. 

_So I turn out the lights  
Lay there in the dark_

Dim moon rays shine through the uncovered windows. They find their way onto her face making it glow ethereally and once again he finds himself captivated by those smooth planes… planes that are now imprinted in his very being… planes that he loves to caress and kiss. 

So he sits there in the darkness, allowing himself to once again drown in the temporary solace that she provides him with.

_And the thought crosses my mind  
If I never wake in the morning  
  
_

He never seems able to have enough of her… no matter how much time he spends with her doing important or unimportant things, each time is a different 'adventure', one that they both are more than glad to take… one that he eagerly looks forward to.

_Would she ever doubt the way I feel  
About her in my heart_

But does she know that?

_If tomorrow never comes  
Will she know how much I love her  
  
_

Did he ever tell her how much she means to him?

Did he ever insist about the importance she plays in his life?

Did she know without a doubt that he loves her so much, that now he lives and breathes for the both of them?

_Did I try in every way to show her everyday  
She's my only one  
  
_

Were the love letter, bouquets or roses and small tender gestures enough?

Or not?

Did she grasp the fact that he'd never be able to love anyone as much as her?

_And if my time on earth were through  
She must face the world without me  
  
_

What if by some stroke of bad luck he ended up dead?

Would she be able to live without him?

Would she be able to move on?

_Is the love I gave her in the past  
Going to be enough to last  
  
_

Would the love that he has given her ever be enough for her to continue with life?

Would she do as he is doing now and live for herself as well as him?

_If tomorrow never comes_

So many doubts… but most importantly would she survive knowing that he loved her endlessly?

_'Cos I've lost a love once in my life  
Who never knew how much I loved them  
  
_

He's always been afraid of rejection… he'd never knew that the fear was groundless in this case. They had loved each other so much however he was still so afraid of declaring his undying affection to her… still heeding the ridiculously fear.

His eyes drift shut and he allows the memories that he kept at bay to blanket him.

_Now I live with the regret  
That my true feelings for them never were revealed_

He remembers the blood and glass splinters all over the place… he remembers the helplessness that overwhelmed him as he saw the paramedics finally free his koi's body from the wreckage.

He remembers being rooted to the spot as desperation and worry gnawed at him.

And it hit him as a major blow mentally when he realised that she'd never know how much she actually meant to him.

_  
So I made a promise to myself  
To say each day how much she means to me  
  
_

It is said that people learn from their experiences.

He blinked the tears away and opened his eyes as he surveyed the little trinkets of affection that littered the small room… tokens of his undying love. 

Were they enough for her?

_And avoid that circumstance  
Well there's no second chance to tell her how I feel_

She deserved more… he slowly bent over her serene figure and brushed his lips across her lips softly as he once again whispered an endearment, allowing his breath to caress the smooth skin.

_If tomorrow never comes  
Will she know how much I love her  
  
_

The tears streamed down his face as he took in her peaceful innocent face… he regretted so many things about their relationship and now he lived in fear that she'd never know how much she meant to him.

_Did I try in every way to show her everyday  
She's my only one  
  
_

He gently took her hand in his and started caressing it. 

It was these small gestures that meant so much to her… he knew that she normally loved the tiniest shows of affections; walking hand in hand, arm around her waist, snuggling up with one another, eating of the same plate… she was a romantic at heart and he loved to make her happy, so he did it all for her.

_And if my time on earth were through  
She must face the world without me  
  
_

If only she'd wake… if only she could know how difficult things were for him now… if only she could have an inkling of how insecure he was about 'them'. 

But would he be here if she were to wake?

Or would he be unreachable?

_Is the love I gave her in the past  
Going to be enough to last  
  
_

He lifted her hand, rubbing the back of it against his stubble roughened cheek. The tears kept on coming as the memories kept on buzzing about him…

The first time he laid eyes on her…

The first time he asked her out…

The first time she actually said yes…

The first time they kissed…

The first time they made love…

But never had he actually declared his undying affection to her…

_If tomorrow never comes_

He remembered their argument… he remembered her sobbing as she asked him where their relationship was headed… he remembered storming out of their apartment.

He rounded the block and he saw her black car.

The roses fell to the ground as he watched paralysed.

The paramedics freed her body from the mangled mess that was the car wreck and all he could do was watch.

_So tell that someone that you love  
Just what you're thinking of  
  
_

A coma…

The machines kept on bleeping… the only source of noise in the room save for the soft sobs that came from Miyagi's huddled frame.

_If tomorrow never comes_

"Aishteru Aya-chan… aishteru"

~sniffles~

Me actually sniffling here…

*sniffles*

Had a sneezing fit a few seconds ago…

But me all better now

*grins*

So what did ya think?

TR gave inspired the idea while I was talking to her…

I dunno I think it suits the song…

Too angsty?

Hmm… not to say I hope it is… but it has been a while since me written angst and if this goes then all's good

*grins*

*starts singing off key*

Tomorrow…

Tomorrow…

I love ya tomorrow…

You're only a day a way…

^^


End file.
